Get Fit, Feel Epic

Monday, 28 January 2013
Get fit, feel epic. Get fit, feel epic. Get fit, feel a bit crap when you're doing it and feel epic when you see the results? More than likely.

I'm not going to lie to you, I've been toying with the idea of writing a post like this for a while but I've never had the confidence. It is thanks to you and the kind, genuine comments I received on my Big Fat Truth post that I've been able to do this. Sandra of The Black Pearl Blog in conjunction with moneysupermarket.com and their Get Fit Feel Epic competition swayed me when I saw the great giveaway for blogging about this. There's nothing like an incentive when it comes to fighting insecurities.

As I've mentioned before I have been overweight for as long as I can remember. Being a UK 18-20 can be difficult but it's not my size that bothers me as much as how awful I feel. Most of this can be attributed to the fact that I have a condition called Fibromyalgia which affects the muscles causing chronic pain and fatigue among other things but I can't shy away from the fact that my weight contributes a huge amount. Pain while dragging yourself around is not helped by being six stone overweight. Due to the fact that gyms are a bad idea for me, I have decided to get fit at home for free doing the amount of exercise I can feasibly do every day. I'd love it if I lost a few inches, of course but the thing I really want to gain from this is to feel healthier.

I've already started and I am slowly losing 1-2 pounds a week. I eat 1500 calories a day including lots of fresh vegetables, less carbohydrates (I haven't cut them all out), less sugar and a serving of fruit. Since I physically can't exercise as much as I would love to I have to keep my calorie intake under control or else it could spiral very quickly from weight stabilisation to gaining weight. I still eat yogurt, eggs, meat etc but I use the whites of eggs instead of the whole thing in an omelette and cut the fat off meat before grilling it in my trusty George Foreman. I'm not saying I haven't wavered and eaten more than 1500 calories or haven't dipped my sticky fingers back into the chocolate drawer for a second helping of snack sized Malteasers but when I do I fully acknowledge that I've slipped and that it's okay. It's just a day and if I don't get results from my new habits I have nobody to blame but myself.

For exercise I use tins of beans as weights and exercise my arms in front of the TV. I walk at least 45 minutes a day to and from school and even if I walk slowly, I am still moving my body and I still count that as exercise. If I am well enough to walk the dog in the evenings I count that as exercise and I log it all in MyFitnessPal. I don't think of the estimated calories I burn as excess calories to eat whatever I want and because I eat big portions of healthy food I find that I rarely get hungry now or go over my calorie limit by more than 100.

My self-confidence is still low. I still wear Spanx, I still cry, I still get hurt when people comment saying I'm fat, ugly and beastly. I'm still not confident enough to do many outfit posts and I'm still learning but this attitude has got me this far. This honesty is what people tell me they enjoy most and if I told you all I'd lost a stone, eat well the entire time, felt completely fabulous about myself since doing X Y and Z I wouldn't be that person anymore. I have to say the first few weeks feel crap. I crave bread, I feel low, I hurt more than usual, I cry about how this is never going to work and how I will always be worthless in everyone's eyes.

They are low points. This blog post was difficult to write and those photos are difficult to share but I hope to feel epic. Maybe not now, maybe not in a month but when I reach my goal of feeling even slightly elated and on the path to epic? I'll let you know.

14 comments:

  1. You don't deserve any of this. I think you look beautiful, so glamorous!

    You should be proud of yourself for everything you're doing and I really hope your weight loss goes smoothly for you and it can be a but f**k you to everyone who has ever put you down.

    You are a beautiful person inside and out (I know how cliched that is, sorry!) I love your posts, all of them :)

    Amy x cocktailsinteacups.blogspot.co.uk

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    1. Thank you so much, Amy. You have no idea how your comments and tweets make me smile and make me more inclined to write here. I hope to be healthier to help my illness, to help my clothes feel less constricting and to feel better about my body but it's a long journey. If I'm fat forever, so be it but I'm determined to help myself as much as I can xo.

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  2. Everything Amy has put is so true. You're an absolutely stunning woman. And the narrow minded people tgst say such horrible things are the ugly ones out there.
    I think the first week or so of a diet does hurt a bit because you're body is screaming at you for all the things from before.
    It's extremely brave of you to put a post like this and I really hope that it does go well for you. Even if you loose 1lb in the end it's one less and it will all add up in the end. Good luck with it and I hope it does go well for you.

    Rhiannon x
    Thesparklypanda.blogspot.co.uk

    Ps sorry for any typos, wrote this on my phone

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    1. Thank you Rhiannon. Your tweets always make me smile and I love the fact that people are so supportive. I want to post the truth here but it's so difficult when faced with insecurities. Alas, these photos are out of Facebook obscurity now and even if I get no smaller the walking, weights and healthy eating will make me healthier and that's the important part xo

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  3. I came to view your blog after Amy @ cocktailsinteacups nominated you for the Liebster Award. Some of your most recent posts have really moved me and as such I am now following you. Good luck and keep smiling.

    Bel
    journeysaremydiary.blogspot.co.uk

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    1. I'm so glad you've enjoyed them. I never would have imagined one person would read what I write let alone over 100! xo

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  4. oh wow I cant believe you have fibromyalgia :O I have it too, Ive had it for over 4 years and it has caused so much strain and depression on my life esp as I have no one as young as me that I know that has it, it always seems to older people, Its very isolating :( sorta refered to it in my new yeas resolutions, toyed with the idea of doing a post on it. Ive been in a bad relapse stage for a few months now maybe when i feel slighly better..and get back t managing my symptoms better.. good luck for the future :) love reading your blog postsxx

    Justaddicingandsprinkles.blogspot.co.uk

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    1. Hi Helen. It's so comforting to know other young people have it too. I've had it for ten years but was only diagnosed three years ago. I'm relapsing too and it's so difficult to get out of bed in the morning my boyfriend has to hoist me up under the arms. It's humiliating at times but we live with it so we have to deal with it. I've been considering writing a post on it too if nothing more than to spread awareness and I would love to read your post. I hope you get slightly better soon and feel free to contact me if you ever need to vent lovely xo

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  5. Amazing post Laura, I can relate to many things you mentioned and I am sticking the the exact same plan as you :) 1500 calories and plenty of exercise and other activities every day.
    I wish you the best of luck in losing weight. I am sure you can do it!

    PS. You are sooo pretty xo

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    1. Me? Coming from you? Seriously, I'm in shock and awe. I think 1500 is a healthy limit without going too over the top. I've been following your weight loss journey and you along with Sophia and Gemma have helped me realise it shouldn't be a battle with weight but with health. I can't wait to see how we all progress xo

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  6. LAURA. I've just discovered your blog and have been devouring your past posts- honestly, you such a genuine breath of fresh air. I can complete relate to how you feel. I'm "fat" at a large size 16 (I'm only 5ft tall!) and sometimes I don't know how I should feel. I was reading your Big Fat Truth post too... I think there's actually a weird level of pressure to "embrace" our curves and deny wanting to be slimmer and healthier. I don't like being fat, but I don't like being miserable either! And whenever I'm on a diet I'm as miserable as sin! It sounds as though this is hard going for you- especially with your illness. Just know that you're not alone! I'm a young teacher- of teenagers- and there's nobody crueler than a teenager to tell you a few home truths! You are an absolute stunner and I wish I was half an glamorous as you! Shall I stop sucking up now?! ;-) absolutely love your blog already, lady xxx

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  7. i can relate! i want to do OOTD's but any time i get my b/f to photograph me, i always hate the way i look! cheers to a great 2013! you (and me) can do this! we got this!

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  8. you're beautiful no matter what size you are - but it's how you feel about yourself that matters. That's my take on it too. I have health issues too that mean I am benefiting from shifting some weight (UK sz 22 at the moment, was UK sz 24 at the start of the year) and it's tough but so rewarding! Well done!

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